


You Were Only Waiting for this Moment to Arise

by JenTheSweetie



Series: Blackbird [2]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-08
Updated: 2013-10-08
Packaged: 2017-12-28 19:45:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/995809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenTheSweetie/pseuds/JenTheSweetie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/967207">Take These Broken Wings and Learn to Fly</a></p><p>It all seemed a little too good to be true for Leonard and Jim from the other side of the hall.  Leonard learns that things aren't always simple, but sometimes it's worth it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Were Only Waiting for this Moment to Arise

**Author's Note:**

> This is a continuation of Take These Broken Wings and Learn to Fly, and I recommend you read it first as a lot of things about this alternate universe are explained in it. Thank you so much to everyone who read, commented and left kudos - it means so much to me. This story really consumed me for a while and I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Please note that there are trigger warnings in the notes at the end to avoid spoiling the plot - none of the official archive warnings apply and I promise everything works out okay, but if you are concerned, please feel free to check.

August in San Francisco, for Leonard, would always mean foggy mornings and sunny afternoons, Jim rushing home from work early to steal an hour at Leonard’s place before the babysitter had to leave, gasping kisses on the couch after David fell asleep, and trips to the park, Jim’s hand on the small of his back as they watched David and Joanna climb higher and higher on the swings.

August faded imperceptibly into September. Jim promised warm weather was ahead, and Leonard continued to doubt him. The kids went back to school, and one morning a week later Leonard was woken by someone crawling into his bed.

"What the fuck," he gasped, arms flailing until they connected with something hard.

"Ow. Shit, Bones."

"Jim?"

"Who else would it be? Nice way to greet a guy," Jim said, rubbing his jaw where Leonard had smacked him.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Leonard asked as Jim wriggled under the covers and tucked his cold feet against Leonard's calves.

"Playing hooky from work. Came to wake you up."

"I mean, how did you get _in_?"

"Oh," Jim said. "That. Yeah, I hacked your door. Don't worry about it. Oh, and your key lets you into my place, now. Just so you know, in case you ever want to return the favor and, I guess, freak me out by getting into my bed in the middle of the night."

"You _hacked_ my - was it easy? Is this place not secure?"

Jim pressed a kiss into Leonard's bare shoulder. "It wasn't that easy. You're probably good. I'm pretty much a genius."

"Asshole," Leonard muttered, wrapping one arm around Jim's waist. They had never woken up together, had barely spent any time in bed that wasn't filled with hot breaths and low moans, and something about this quiet moment was beautiful. "You could have chimed and waited for me to answer like a normal person instead of _breaking into my house_."

"I didn't think that would be as fun as this," Jim said, sliding his hand down Leonard's chest and biting his earlobe.

"I was sleeping," Leonard grumbled as Jim's lips sought his.

"Not anymore," Jim said.

Afterwards, as they lay in bed, the sun streaming in through the window, Leonard considering drifting back to sleep, but Jim was wide awake. "A day off! No kids! It's beautiful out. Bones, think what we could do today. We could be naked all day, we could - "

"Sounds good to me," Leonard said, rolling over and burrowing his head in the pillow. "Let's do that first one."

"No, you're not going back to sleep," Jim said, elbowing him in the ribs. "Get up. We're going to the wharf. Also, it's warm out today, I _told_ you it would get nice in September. Please can we go? Please?"

"Warm out?" Leonard said, lifting his head from the pillow and meeting Jim's eager electric eyes. What had he gotten himself into? This grown ass man did a better puppy dog face than Joanna. "All right."

-

Jim hadn't been lying: it was a beautiful day. They picked up bacon-wrapped hotdogs when they got to the wharf and walked through the touristy gift shops and vendors selling fresh fish. The sun bounced off the bay and into their eyes. 

Leonard spent a minute worrying that they wouldn't have enough to say to each other - they didn't spend much time together without one or both of their children around, and lately their lips had been busy during all the time they'd had without David in the room - but his apprehension proved unnecessary. Jim filled the space between them with questions about Leonard's childhood, stories about drunk nights out with Gaila and old classmates, and a running tally of how many alien life forms they encountered as they passed through the wharf.

They reached a long pier that extended far into the bay where some San Franciscans left pleasure boats. They walked to the very end, all the way to the point where the cement gave way to old, slightly rotted wood, and they took off their shoes and dangled their feet over the edge of the pier, the water sparkling below them. Jim leaned back on his hands and tilted his head, facing the Presidio as five small ships took off from the Academy. Leonard watched as Jim followed their path as they flew over the Golden Gate Bridge and out toward the Pacific Ocean, then turned up and disappeared into space.

"Do you miss it?" he asked, the question tumbling out before he'd thought about it.

"The Academy? Starfleet? Space?" Jim laughed. "All of the above."

"You never think about going back?" 

"Think about it? Sure." Jim glanced over at him. "Not seriously."

"What would you have done, if you'd finished?"

"If you'd listened to me when I got there - I was going to be a starship captain."

"No shit," Leonard said.

"I was on the accelerated command track. Chris - my advisor - he thought I could've had my own ship by the time I was 30." Jim shrugged. "Sounded cool at the time. Still sounds cool, if I'm totally honest. But David… well, that was that."

"You could've done something else," Leonard said, squinting into the bright sun. "Gone to a starbase or an outpost, something like that."

"You sound like the admiral," Jim said, and Leonard cocked his head. "Carol's dad. Admiral Marcus. He did everything he could to convince me to stay and finish up at the Academy. Graduate and make him proud, because Carol never would. But after Carol died, it didn't seem worth it."

Jim fell silent, his eyes on the bridge, his feet swinging. 

"I almost enlisted, once," Leonard said. "A few years ago. The first time I almost - when Jocelyn and I almost split. A recruiter got to me, made it sound like it'd be a great idea. But we, " Leonard thought back, choosing his words carefully, "we decided to keep working on being married. Have a baby instead." He laughed darkly. "See how well that worked out."

They watched as the squadron that had taken off earlier re-entered the atmosphere and landed, gently, in the middle of the Academy. As soon as the last craft landed, Jim stood up. "Let's get going."

On the walk back toward their neighborhood, Jim dragged Leonard into a store that sold hats – old-fashioned fedoras and beanies, baseball caps, replica headdresses from distant planets. Jim pulled on a hat that fell low over his forehead and was covered in ridges.

"Do I make a hot Klingon?" he asked, arranging his face into a scowl.

"I have never wanted you more," Leonard said dryly. Jim leaned in and kissed him, the prickly eyebrows scratching Leonard's forehead. "Ugh, remind me never to get that close to a Klingon again." Jim put the Klingon headpiece back and picked up one that gave him a classic Vulcan look, pointy ears and all, and Leonard shuddered. "Don't even come near me with that thing on. That haircut freaks me out."

"But making out right now would be extremely logical, Dr. McCoy," Jim intoned, and Leonard shoved him in the chest, chuckling. While Jim replaced the Vulcan hat, Leonard perused a stack of children's knitted hats that looked like animals. After a moment, he picked up one that was supposed to look like a panda and headed to the front of the shop.

"Didn't realize you were such a fan of pandas," Jim said seriously, joining him at the checkout counter. "That's gonna look really cute on you."

Leonard rolled his eyes. "It's for Jo. She loves pandas. Don't ever ask her about them, she'll talk your ear off. _Daddy, did you know pandas almost went extinct in the 21st century? Daddy, did you know that pandas have pink skin? Daddy -_ " he cut himself off, suddenly feeling like his throat was closing up. He grabbed the hat off the counter and stalked out of the store.

Jim caught up to him on the street. He didn't say anything for a few minutes, just followed Leonard through the crowds. When they were out of the main part of the wharf and hiking up the hill toward Nob Hill, he said, "Hey. You okay?" 

"Yeah," Leonard said, relieved his voice was clear. "Of course."

"I know you miss her when she's not here," Jim said.

"Understatement," Leonard said.

"How come she doesn't come more often?" Jim asked slowly. "I mean I know she goes to school there, but - well, I had a friend growing up whose dad lived in Paris, and he went pretty much every weekend, and back and forth all summer. Sometimes he caught a shuttle and got there in time for dinner and came back before school in the morning. And Georgia's not even as far."

Leonard had wondered when this question would come. "She doesn't want to come more," he said shortly.

"Why not?" Jim asked. "You're an awesome dad."

"She doesn’t agree," Leonard said, taking a deep breath. "Because I left her mama."

"Well - I mean, that's how divorce works, right? You split up and somebody leaves." 

"I walked out," Leonard said, and saying it out loud for the first time made it ring in his ears. "In the middle of the night. Jocelyn - she wanted to keep trying." He ran his hands through his hair. "She - it wasn't pretty. Jo was there. She doesn't understand - she doesn't understand it had been bad for a long time. She couldn't remember that we'd been fighting for years. In her mind, I just decided to leave one night, and that was that." Leonard clenched his fists. "Jocelyn fought for full custody, and she almost got it, on the grounds that I had caused _emotional trauma_. Until Jo wants to come more - a weekend a month is all I get." 

"That fucking sucks," Jim said. "I'm sorry.” They trudged up the steep hill. “She'll understand one day."

Leonard shrugged. He wasn't so sure. 

They reached the top of the hill, and Jim reached out and took his clenched fist, threaded his fingers in between Leonard's, and squeezed. Leonard squeezed back, and they started down the other side.

\- 

Tuesdays always dragged; the interminable hours of the day were just a countdown to night, when Leonard would pick up the cuisine of the week and bring it back to Jim and David’s. This Tuesday was Indian, and Leonard walked downtown to get the best curry in the city, then hiked back up the hill to their building. He was digging through the bag, worried he’d forgotten the extra naan for David, when the doors slid open before he’d swiped his key.

An unfamiliar dark-haired man stood in the doorframe. Leonard frowned. 

“Who are you?” he asked.

The man smiled. Leonard wasn’t comforted. “You must be Leonard. Or should I say Mr. Bones? I’ve heard so much about you from David.”

Leonard tried to look over the man’s shoulder, pushing down the feeling of uneasiness in his stomach. “Where’s Jim?”

“Is that dinner you have there?” the man asked, his accent drawling, his eyes never leaving Leonard’s face. “How lovely. You must come in.” He stood another moment in the doorway before stepping aside as if the invitation to enter was his to give. Leonard pushed by him roughly. David was sitting on the couch, his knees pulled up to his chest, his eyes wide.

“Jim?” Leonard called.

“I’m here,” Jim said quietly. He was standing in the corner of the kitchen, his face cold and blank, and he didn’t smile. “This – this is John.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” John said. He didn’t extend a hand, and he glanced at Jim, who stood perfectly still.

“You too,” Leonard said slowly. He couldn’t remember Jim ever mentioning anyone named John, not in all his stories about the Academy or the guys at work. “I wasn’t expecting four. There might not be enough food.”

“We’ll be fine, I’m sure,” John said smoothly. “David, come to the table.”

“Yes, Papa,” David said, and the world dropped out from under Leonard’s feet. He set the bag down hard on the countertop, feeling John’s eyes on the back of his head as he automatically began unloading dinner. When everything was set on the counter, he looked up at Jim, desperate for some answer, some reassurance that he was misunderstanding, but Jim was watching John, his eyes narrowed, his features set.

“I’m not really hungry,” Leonard said, and his voice sounded like a stranger’s. “I’m not – I’m not feeling that well. You three enjoy. I’m gonna head home.”

“Oh, you must stay,” John said, his face arranging itself into a mask of disappointment. “I would love to get to know you. Any friend of James and David is a friend of mine.”

“Another time,” Leonard said, backing toward the door. It whooshed open behind him, and he stumbled out, trying not to trip over his feet. As the doors slid shut, he saw John smiling in the doorway.

Leonard’s hands were shaking as he keyed himself into his apartment. He got a glass of water; his hunger really had evaporated. He sat at the kitchen table, waiting, desperately, for Jim to burst in, to explain it all away, to tell him who John was, why he acted like he lived at Jim’s place, why David had called that man _papa_ – but the doors stayed resolutely shut. Leonard watched as the sunlight faded from the window in the living room. It was the longest Tuesday night he’d ever had.

-

_LMcCoy [2261.263]: You got anything you want to tell me about?_  
 _LMcCoy [2261.263]: No?_  
 _LMcCoy [2261.264]: Jim?_

-

Leonard passed through the biofilter on his way out of the hospital and waved at the nurse on duty. It was still light out, though he had expected nighttime; his internal clock was screwed up. He squinted against the light and didn’t notice the man leaning against the wall next to the doctor’s entrance until he had passed him.

“Bones,” Jim said, and Leonard froze, but didn’t turn.

“Hey, Jim,” he said. He wanted to be angry, he had planned on being furious the next time he ran into Jim in the lift or on the street, but now that Jim was here, the sleepless nights caught up with him all at once and he was too tired. He felt Jim place a tentative hand on his shoulder.

“Hey,” Jim said quietly. “I’m sorry I didn’t reply to your messages.”

Leonard didn’t answer, and shrugged Jim’s hand off. The messages were the least of his worries. He turned slowly to face Jim; he was unprepared to see how drawn Jim looked. Leonard felt like he had barely slept in days, but it looked like Jim hadn’t slept at all.

“What the fuck’s going on?” he asked, his voice low. 

Jim sighed. “I – it’s hard to explain.”

“Try me,” Leonard snapped. “Because it seems pretty simple to explain to me. How many others are there?”

“How many others are there _what_?” Jim asked. His feigned innocence made bile rise in Leonard’s throat.

“How many other people were you _fucking_ behind his back? How many besides me?”

“Bones,” Jim said, shaking his head. “It's not like that. There’s no one else. Please – just listen – John and I aren’t – ”

“And you let him answer the fucking _door_ ,” Leonard snarled, remembering John’s smirk. “You knew it would be me, and you let him answer the door.”

“I couldn’t – Bones, give me a second to – ”

“Forget it, Jim,” Leonard said, turning away and starting down the sidewalk, his fists clenched. “Time’s up.”

-

As Jim had promised, October in San Francisco was beautiful. Leonard’s time became divided into just two blocks: Joanna and not Joanna. He rearranged his schedule so he was working Tuesday nights.

Leonard spent a full Saturday walking through Golden Gate Park. Shuttles whizzed overhead, drum circles pounded out their rhythms on the grass, and children climbed jungle gyms, cleaner and newer than the ones in the park by Leonard’s building. He would bring Joanna here in a few weeks. She was used to spending her weekends with David and Jim; he would need a lot of plans to keep her busy. 

By the time Leonard got off at the shuttle stop closest to his building, he was sweating and eager for the climate control of his apartment. He swiped himself in and went to the turbolift.

“Hold the lift!” 

Leonard flung out a hand and caught the doors as Jim turned the corner and skidded to a stop in front of the lift.

“Oh,” Jim said. “I can wait.”

Leonard pursed his lips, his stomach clenching. “Get in the fucking lift,” he said finally, and Jim stepped inside.

Leonard stared straight ahead as the lift doors closed and they began their slow ascent. Jim, he could tell, was fidgeting. He glanced over, then back at the wall, firm in his effort to remain silent, not even to _look_ at Jim. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jim shift from one foot to the other, swinging his arms.

“Can you ever fucking hold still?” he muttered, glancing at Jim again. He frowned, tilting his head. “What the fuck happened to your face?”

“What?” Jim said. “Nothing.”

It was a lie: Jim’s left eye was ringed with a fading, purple-green bruise, and a patch on his cheek was bright pink, like a cut had been inexpertly and incompletely healed with a dermal regenerator. “Jim,” Leonard said suspiciously. “Why didn’t you get those fixed right? What the fuck happened?”

“Bar fight,” Jim said. He cracked a smile. “You should see the other guy.” 

It didn’t ring true. “Don’t fuck with me. What happened?” Leonard asked, almost afraid to hear the answer. Jim shrugged nonchalantly.

“It’s not a big deal.”

“Bullshit,” Leonard said, stepping forward to examine Jim’s eye more carefully. “You didn’t get these in a fucking bar fight. This cut looks like it was deep.” His stomach sank. “Jim – ”

“I held my own,” Jim said quietly, staring at the floor. “You don’t have to worry about it.”

“Was it John?” Leonard asked, horrified. Jim’s silence didn’t argue with him. “But – why?”

“Are we talking again?” His voice was plaintive.

Leonard gaped at him. “Are you gonna tell me what the hell is going on?”

The lift opened, depositing them on the fifth floor. “No,” Jim said flatly. “See you around.” He stepped out of the lift and turned left.

-

It was Leonard's turn to lie in wait. He leaned against the wall of the shuttle station on California and Van Ness on his next day off, knowing Jim usually left at 2 on Thursdays to pick David up from school. 

Right on schedule, Jim appeared at the front door, his head down, and headed down Van Ness toward Nob Hill. Leonard felt plastered to the wall, his nerve gone; the worry and fury and confusion churning in his stomach battled it out, and he wasn't sure what was going to win out until the memory of the faded bruise around Jim's eye floated to the top.

"Jim," he called, stepping out of the shadows. 

Jim looked up, startled. Leonard jogged to catch up with him.

"You shouldn't be here," Jim said, and started crossing the street. Leonard froze, the brush off feeling like a slap, but then followed him.

"Why not?" Leonard asked as they reached the other side of the street. "What's going on?" Jim kept his head down and didn't answer. The bruise around his eye was so faded that it was almost invisible, and the pink slash along his cheek was nearly healed, and wouldn't scar. "Jim, are you really gonna fucking ignore me?"

Jim looked over his shoulder, and Leonard did too, automatically, but there was no one there. 

"In here," Jim said, and grabbed Leonard by the arm and pulled him into a small, dark bar. He dragged him all the way to the back and shoved him, roughly, into a booth with high walls. He sat down on the other side, facing the door.

Leonard looked back and forth between Jim and the door. "Jim, is someone _following_ you?"

"Probably not," Jim said, his eyes scanning the bar.

"Will you tell me what the _fuck_ is going on?" Leonard hissed. 

“It’s a long story,” Jim said.

“I ain’t got anywhere else to be,” Leonard replied evenly. “And I think you owe me an explanation.” He met Jim’s eyes and held them, trying to see past them, wondering what Jim would tell him – wondering if Jim would tell him the truth.

“I met John a few months after Carol died,” Jim said quietly. “Her dad – Admiral Marcus – he introduced us, actually. He wasn’t around much, but he was good with David, and when he was here, we had a good time. Eventually we – were together.” Jim’s face twisted as he said it. “David and I moved into his apartment. David couldn’t remember Carol, and I didn’t think it would hurt for him to have another parent.” He shook his head. “John spent a lot of time off planet. He didn’t tell me what he was doing. I was fucking stupid. I didn’t know what I was getting into. He – he started talking about a lot of stuff I didn’t understand. Stuff I didn’t _want_ to understand. His trips away got longer, and finally David and I moved out. About a year ago. He didn’t take it well.”

“And now he’s back,” Leonard said dully.

“We hadn’t seen him for months before he showed up that day, Bones. He and I – we haven’t been together in a long time. We’re not together. We’re never going to be together again,” Jim said firmly.

Leonard rested his hands on the metal table, sticky with old beer. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked. The pieces weren’t fitting together, but the almost-gone bruise around Jim’s eye wasn’t lying. “That night – if you’d just said something – but the way you looked at him, I thought – ”

“I know,” Jim said. “I’m sorry. It’s – it’s complicated.”

Leonard sat back against the booth. “Right,” he said coldly. “Complicated.”

“David loves him,” Jim said. “And John doesn’t accept that we’re not – that he’s not part of our family anymore. He usually gets what he wants. When he doesn’t get what he wants, things get – ugly.”

“Hence, the…” Leonard trailed off, gesturing to Jim’s face. Jim shrugged.

“I gave as good as I got,” he said casually.

“Why didn’t you get them cleaned up?”

Jim didn’t answer.

“Is he staying with you? Is that why you haven’t come to tell me any of this before?” Leonard pressed, hating the desperation in his voice. “Is that why you didn’t message me back?” 

“I sleep on the couch,” Jim said, a little desperately. “Bones – you have to believe me.”

“I do,” Leonard said, and he thought he did. 

Jim ran his hands through his hair and looked back at the doorway. “He’s been talking about leaving again. John is,” he paused, seeming to select his words carefully. “John is a complicated person. Things with him are never what they seem. I’m keeping the peace for David’s sake. If he doesn’t take it out on me, he takes it out on - ” Jim's communicator beeped. He pulled it out. "Hello?"

"Aren't you meeting me at David's school?" It was John.

"Yes," Jim said evenly. "I'm on my way."

"Good. Come now." Jim snapped the communicator shut and stood up.

"I have to go," Jim said.

Leonard was stunned. "Jim - you let him order you around like that?" he asked weakly. He couldn't imagine anyone holding that kind of power over Jim, and he wondered if he'd ever known him at all.

Jim looked down at him coldly. "I don't _let_ him do anything, Bones. I play his games, and he leaves David alone. What the fuck would you do if you were me?"

Leonard couldn't answer. There was no limit to what he would do to protect Joanna - but he hadn't ever envisioned actually having to do it.

"Yeah," Jim said. "Just - stay away for now. He has a feeling, I think, about – about us, and I don’t want him to think about it any more than he has to. I don’t want you mixed up in this. He'll leave, soon, I think, and we'll - we'll figure it out, okay?" 

"Okay," Leonard said, but it wasn't, not at all, and Jim was already on his way out the door.

-

Leonard was returning from a late shift at the hospital, ready to crawl into bed and spend a full eight hours not thinking, when the door to Jim's apartment slid open. 

"Leonard," John said, stepping into the hallway, and Leonard froze.

"John," he said, working to keep his voice casual. "Hey."

"Coming home from work? How's the hospital?"

"Fine," Leonard said.

"I was thinking, we haven't spent nearly enough time together since I've been home," John said, and Leonard clenched his jaw at the last word. "Why don't you come for dinner this weekend? Your daughter will be here, correct? Joanna?"

Leonard smothered a shudder as John's lips formed around Joanna's name. 

"Might be busy," Leonard said. "We've got a lot of plans."

"Oh, but David would so like to see you both," John said. "Surely you can make some time. For the children."

Leonard's mind was working in overdrive. He thought about what Jim had said about John, about the faded bruise, about David, about Jo. 

"Sure," he heard himself saying. "Saturday night. See you then." He turned, blindly, back to his own door, his hands shaking as he swiped his key card.

"I look forward to it," John said.

-

Dinner was quiet. Leonard felt like his mouth was full of sand; he could barely get words out, even if he'd wanted to. David and Joanna filled the silence easily, and when their conversation dried up, John peppered Joanna with questions about herself. Jim stared at his plate most of the night, his jaw working all the while like he wanted to say something but had to keep biting his tongue.

After dinner, the kids pulled out 3D checkers. They didn't know how to play, but they made a spectacle of piling up the pieces on various parts of the board and seeing how high they could build before they spilled over.

"Leonard," John said. "David tells me you've helped out and stayed around when James had to work late. He says you're better at reading his favorite stories than his father is." John smiled broadly. 

"Joanna likes doing the voices," Leonard said. "I guess I'm used to it."

"Well, we certainly appreciate your help," John said. "If I can't be here with him all the time, I'm glad to hear there's been someone else around who cares about him."

"What are friends for?" Leonard said weakly, hearing echoes of himself, and Jim looked up at him and met his eyes for the first time all night. Leonard wanted to reach out to touch Jim, to see if he was still solid. Their last dinner around this table, weeks ago, seemed like a memory from another lifetime.

"Indeed," John said, watching the children play on the floor. "What _are_ friends for." Leonard watched as Jim's eyes flashed. If he hadn't already believed Jim when he said he and John were no longer involved - _mostl_ y believed Jim - he would have believed him now. The tension between them was thick, like molten lava. Leonard didn't want to get any closer.

"Jo, you ready to go?" Leonard called, and Joanna ignored him.

"Oh, so soon?" John asked, his voice dripping with false disappointment. 

"Big plans tomorrow," Leonard said. "We're going to pier 39. Jo wants to ride the carousel." The words were barbed, a private message, like a secret whispered across the table that Leonard wasn't sure Jim would hear. He watched, satisfied, as the corners of Jim's lips turned up. "Baby, let's go home," Leonard said, standing up. 

"But Daddy - "

"Joanna," he said firmly. "Don't argue with me." Joanna pouted.

"Bye, Davy," she said sullenly, joining Leonard at the door. "See you in a few weeks."

"Bye Joanna," David said, looking lonely from his place on the floor, the checkers pieces scattered around him.

"See you around," Leonard said stiffly, nodding at John and Jim.

"Have a wonderful evening," John said, smiling and joining David on the floor. Leonard took Joanna's hand and pulled her out the door. 

The doors to their own apartment had barely whooshed shut when Joanna said, "Is that man Jim's husband?"

"No," Leonard said. 

"But he's Davy's papa?" Joanna's face twisted, like she was trying to puzzle it out.

"It's like how your mama is still your mama and I'm still your daddy, even though your mama and I aren't married anymore," Leonard said.

"Oh," Joanna said. She wrinkled her nose. "I hope he doesn't stay around. I don't like him."

Leonard burst out laughing. "Me neither, baby. Me neither."

-

Joanna's visit - interrupted though it was - was a ray of light. They spent time abusing John, who Joanna deemed "creepy" and "not fun at all" and who Leonard privately called much worse. Her shuttle flight back on Sunday was earlier than usual, as Jocelyn had dinner planned with her parents in Atlanta, and Leonard tried not to be bitter.

When he arrived back at his apartment after dropping her off, rubbing his dry eyes, his comm was beeping. He sat down and flicked the switch. The video feed flipped on to show Jim, looking distracted.

"Oh, you're there," Jim said.

"Just walked in," Leonard said, his chest contracting. "You need something?"

"I can't get away at work, and Gaila has to leave early," Jim said, looking over his shoulder. "Half the shuttles scheduled to leave in the next half hour are shut down." 

Leonard tilted his head. "I just watched Jo take off, everything seemed fine."

"It was, until like five minutes ago, and now three reactors have blown in as many minutes," Jim said, shaking his head. "It’s fucking nuts. Can you go over to my place?"

"Where's John?" Leonard asked stiffly.

"I can't get ahold of him," Jim said. 

"You sure he'll be okay with it?" Leonard asked, unable to keep the aggressiveness out of his voice.

"If he's going to disappear, I don't think I give a shit. Bones - thanks," Jim said. "You're a lifesaver."

"Sure," Leonard said, flipping the switch to the off position and slipping his feet back into his shoes. He left his place and pressed the chime at Jim and David's. He waited, then pressed it again.

"Gaila?" he called. "David?" There was no answer, and he chimed again. He looked around, then pulled out his key; he assumed Jim (or John) had deactivated it, but it was worth a try. He swiped it, and the doors whooshed open.

"Gaila?" he said, walking inside. The small apartment was still and silent. Leonard poked his head into the kitchen, and then into David's room. He was about to leave, thinking they might be at the park, when a curl of red hair spilling out from the other side of the bed caught his eye.

"What the - " he said. He walked around the bed, dread clawing like an animal up his throat, and found Gaila slumped on the floor, her eyes closed.

"Shit," he said, falling to his knees beside her and immediately feeling for a pulse on her neck. Orion pulses were usually strong, and slightly faster than human's, but Gaila's was slow and weak. He pulled out his comm. "We have a medical emergency," he said, rattling off the address. "Orion female. Send a medical team right away." 

Even as he said it, Gaila's eyes fluttered open.

"Gaila, are you okay? What happened?" Leonard asked, grabbing her hand. "Where's David?"

"John," Gaila whispered, her voice scratchy, and the wild animal in Leonard's stomach clawed harder. "He told David to pack a bag, he tried to take him, but I said he had to wait until Jim got home. He had a phaser. He stunned me."

"Jesus," Leonard said, and pulled his comm out again. "Jim? McCoy to Kirk. Dammit, Jim, pick up!"

"Bones?" Jim's voice came. "What's going on?"

"John," Leonard breathed. "John stunned Gaila. Jim - he has David."

"Where?" Jim said, his voice steady.

"I don't know," Leonard said. 

"He told David that his grandpa would be there, waiting for them," Gaila said, sitting up and looking pale. 

"Jim, he mentioned Admiral Marcus," Leonard said. "Gaila, lie down."

"Alexander?" Jim asked blankly. "I didn't even know they were still in contact - does Gaila know anything else?"

Gaila shook her head weakly, her eyes glistening. "Jim, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry - " she said, and Leonard shook his head.

"Gaila, it's not your fault," Jim said. "Fuck, where could he be taking him? They're not going to get out of the city, the shuttles are all delayed, and he couldn't get David on a shuttle without me anyway - but where could they - _fuck_. The Academy."

"What?" Leonard asked, nonplussed.

"He's taking him to the Academy," Jim said, sounding out of breath. "There are shuttles there, he could - he wouldn't even have to steal one if Alexander is - oh my god, he's taking him off-planet."

"Jim, where are you going?" Leonard asked frantically.

"The Academy," Jim said. "I have to get there before they leave."

"I'm on my way," Leonard said.

"No - Bones, stay out of this, stay with Gaila - "

"I'm fine," Gaila pleaded, and Leonard heard the medical team come in through the front door.

"In here," Leonard called to them, and they rushed in. "Jim, I'm coming. Tell me where to meet you."

"I'm at the station on Van Ness and Clay - fuck, I should just run, if this fucking shuttle doesn't come - "

"Wait for me," Leonard said, running out the front door. "Jim, wait for me."

The ride down to the first floor in the turbolift had never been longer. Leonard sprinted out the front door and took off toward Van Ness, his lungs burning. 

Jim was standing at the corner, pacing back and forth, when Leonard ran up. A shuttle caught up to him and paused for them.

"Fuck - Bones, I told you - "

"Shut up and get in the shuttle," Leonard huffed, dragging himself up the back steps of the shuttle and collapsing in the nearest seat. Jim stood in front of him as the shuttle lifted up and headed west.

"Jim," Leonard said. "It's going to be okay. We'll get him." He projected a confidence he didn't feel, a confidence Jim clearly didn't believe. His face was drawn, tight with tension.

"We'll get him," Leonard repeated, hauling himself up, his hands hovering by Jim's shoulders, afraid to touch him after so long.

"Fuck," Jim said. "Bones - I can't - I can't lose him - "

"You won't," Leonard said, and he wrapped his hand around the back of Jim's neck and pulled him in, kissing him hard. Jim relaxed, fractionally, against his lips, then pulled back and leaned his forehead against Leonard's, the sweat dripping from their brows.

"I'm sorry," Jim said, his eyes wide.

"Me too," Leonard said. He released Jim and sat back down, heavily. "Jim, is there anything else I should know about what's going on? Why is John trying to take David off-planet without you?"

Jim looked out the window as they landed, briefly, in Pacific Heights, and a few passengers got off the front of the shuttle. "John's not - he's not normal."

"Well I fucking know _that_ \- "

"I mean he's not - he's not fully human," Jim said, his voice low. 

"Okay, what is he?" Leonard asked blankly. His mind was racing - there were a lot of mixed people around, it wasn't that big of a deal, and you couldn't usually tell unless they ended up being telepathic or pale green or had those ugly pointed ears - and he wracked his brain but couldn't remember any distinguishing part-alien features John had.

"He's - in the 20th century, during the Eugenics Wars - have you ever heard of the augments?"

"I mean, the stories, yeah - "

"They weren't stories," Jim said. "They're real. And John - his real name is Khan, and he's one of them."

"Jim," Leonard said. "That's - that doesn't - the Eugenics Wars were 250 years - "

"He was cryogenically frozen," Jim said as the shuttle touched down just inside the Presidio. "I can't - I'll explain later, but Bones, you have to know - he's powerful. He's killed people before, a _lot_ of people, and he'll do it again." The shuttle doors opened, and Jim took off running. 

Leonard stared after him, gaping. There was a long moment where Leonard considered staying on the shuttle, going back to his apartment and never looking back. He thought of Jo, and Jocelyn. And then he followed Jim.

Jim was running at full speed, and Leonard could barely keep up. "Where are we going?" he gasped.

"Shuttle bay," Jim said. "It might be too late - but we can take one, and go after them - "

"Steal a shuttle from Starfleet?" Leonard hissed. "Are you crazy? They'll shoot us down."

"I know a lot of evasive maneuvers," Jim said, rounding a corner and slowing down. He paused outside a large door and pulled out his comm. "Starfleet security? There are intruders in shuttle bay 1. Do you read me?"

"I read you - who is this?" a voice came over the comm. "Where are you calling from?"

"Don't worry about it, just send security - a lot - there's a kidnapping in progress," Jim said, snapping his comm shut and sticking it back into his pocket.

"What's your plan, Jim?"

Jim paused, his hand on the way to the door. "I don't know. Get David back. I'll figure it out as I go." Without another word, he pulled open the door.

The shuttle bay was dark. On the far side, a few pinpricks of light shined down on a shuttle that was buzzing quietly, warming up. Jim took off, running between two rows of shuttles, and Leonard followed, trying to quell his heavy breathing. Jim stopped when they were two shuttles away, and they stayed in the shadows, peering around the edge.

"Where's Daddy? Isn't he coming?" a small voice came from the other side of the lit shuttle, and Jim grabbed the shuttle, sagging with relief. 

"He's fine," Leonard whispered. "He's fine."

"Daddy might have to catch up with us later." Leonard didn't recognize that voice, but Jim's face hardened.

"That's Alexander," he said quietly. "Carol's dad. God - I should have fucking known they were in on it together - Marcus has always wanted to - "

"I thought you said he was coming _now_ ," David whined. "With my toys."

"We'll get new toys when we get there," the other man, Admiral Marcus, said soothingly. He turned the corner, holding David by the hand. Jim took a step forward, and Leonard grabbed the back of his shirt. 

"What are you going to do?" Leonard hissed in his ear. "Jim, if you're right, if he's what you say he is - we're not armed - what are you going to do?"

"John, are you ready?" Admiral Marcus asked.

John walked out of the shuttle dressed all in black. "Let's go. David, I don't want to hear any more whining."

"But Papa - "

"David," John said quietly, and David shut his mouth. "Get in the shuttle." 

"Not so fast," Jim said, stepping out of the shadow of the shuttle and into the light. "David, don't get in the shuttle."

"Daddy!" David said. "Are you coming with us to Risa? Papa's taking us on vacation."

"We're not going on vacation," Jim said. "John, what the hell are you doing? You're not going to get away with this."

John raised an eyebrow. "I wouldn't be so sure, James."

"Let him go," Jim said. 

"David, get in the shuttle," John said commandingly. David looked between John and Jim.

"Jim," Admiral Marcus said, in a voice he clearly thought would be soothing. "It's over now. It's too late."

"I'll deal with you later," Jim snapped, never taking his eyes off John. "You think this is what Carol would want? Taking him away from me for - for whatever the fuck you're doing out there?"

"Language, James," John drawled. "David, we don't use naughty words like that, do we?"

David didn't answer.

"David, come here," Jim said. "Come over here with Daddy."

"But Papa said - "

"Don't listen to him," Jim said. "John, what are you taking him for? What do you want with him?"

"I'm starting over," John said. "With my family. My crew. My _real_ family." Leonard had no idea what he was talking about. "And David is going to be part of that family."

"No, he's not," Jim said.

"You could have been too, you know," John said thoughtfully. "You were, for a while. I thought you would see the advantages."

"We were never family," Jim said. "You don't even know what that means."

"I would do anything for my family," John said, as if Jim hadn't even spoken. "I would, and I am. We're done here." He reached into his pocket, pulled out a phaser, and pointed it at Jim's chest. 

"Fuck you," Jim said. Leonard began to creep around the other side of the shuttle, barely able to think about anything except getting to the phaser.

John shrugged. "If only you had, maybe we wouldn't be here now. It's not on stun, James. Think carefully about this."

"Come now, John," Admiral Marcus said admonishingly. "Not in front of the boy. David, let's go." He pulled David in the direction of the open shuttlecraft door, and Leonard crept up to the ramp on his hands and knees.

"Daddy?" David said, his voice very small. "What's going on?"

"Don't be scared, Davy," Jim said, his eyes still locked on John. "It's going to be okay."

"I don't want to go," David said, pulled against Admiral Marcus's grip as Marcus dragged him up the ramp. "Grandpa, you're hurting me."

"You have until he's out of sight to turn around and go," John said. "If you don't look back, you can leave. Maybe he'll visit in twenty years. You can dream."

"Daddy!" David shrieked as Marcus pulled him into the shuttle. "Daddy! Papa, _no_!"

John glanced, quickly, over his shoulder at David, and Leonard lunged. He grabbed at the phaser in John's hand, his heart in his throat, and he thought, for a moment, that he had it, that he would pull it from John's hand. He heard Jim shout something and saw him running toward them out of the corner of his eye. 

But then John was wrenching loose; he pulled back his arm and shoved Leonard away, hard, harder than seemed possible, and Leonard slammed into the exterior of the shuttle next to them, his head snapping hard against the wall and exploding in pain. He heard shouts coming from the other side of the shuttle bay.

"Bad idea, Leonard," John said, turning the phaser on him, and Leonard fought to keep his eyes open as his vision went black at the edges, wanting to stare the man in the eye as he died. 

"Jim," he said weakly. "Stay back, Jim - "

But Jim flew out of nowhere, grabbing John around the waist and dragging him to the ground, and the phaser went off, and everything went black.

-

Leonard woke up to the sound of a biobed beeping. He opened his eyes to the last person he expected.

"Joce?" he asked, his voice rough.

"Hey," Jocelyn said, standing up from the couch. Joanna was curled up next to her, fast asleep. "You're awake."

"Yeah," Leonard said. "Don't look so excited.”

"Shut up," Jocelyn said, but her voice was gentle. "I'm glad you're okay. Jo was so scared."

"What happened?" Leonard said, wanting to shake the mothballs out of his head. "Where's - is Jim - ?"

"He's okay," Jocelyn said, and Leonard felt his heart skip several beats. "He and David are both okay. They’re in another wing here, but they’re fine."

"Why are you here?" Leonard asked.

"When I got home from picking Jo up from the shuttle station, I had a message from someone named Gaila," Jocelyn said. "She said you had been hurt and they weren't sure if - they didn't know what was going to happen to you. We turned around and went back to the station." She smiled. "I thought she was your new girlfriend."

Leonard chuckled. "Not quite."

"No," Jocelyn said. "She's a little out of your league, Len. She explained about Jim, and John - kind of. I don't really understand."

"Me neither," Leonard said, shaking his head. He winced. 

"Your skull is fractured," Jocelyn said. "But they said you'll be okay. Gaila told me they said you were fighting John for a phaser. What the hell were you thinking?"

"Good question," Leonard said, trying to erase the image of Jim staring down the phaser in John’s hand.

"You're in love with him," Jocelyn said, looking down at her hands. It wasn't a question.

"I - shit, I don't know what I am," Leonard said. 

"It's okay," Jocelyn said, and when she looked up her eyes were clear. "Being apart has - has made a lot of things clear. If you are in love with him, I think I can be happy for you. Eventually."

"Joce," Leonard said, and found he had nothing else to say. "Thanks." 

"I'm going to take her home," Jocelyn said. "It's the middle of the night. I have a room downtown - we'll come back in the morning, okay?" She leaned down and picked up Joanna. "Shh, babygirl," she whispered as Joanna roused. 

"See you," Leonard said, and watched them leave, the beeping of the biobed the only sound. 

\- 

Joanna and Jocelyn spent most of the day in Leonard’s hospital room visiting while Leonard fussed and harassed the on-duty doctors and nurses about when he would be released. Leonard didn’t want to let Joanna out of his sight, and complained endlessly when two Starfleet officers asked for privacy while they questioned him around lunchtime. Joanna and Jocelyn joined him again after they left and stayed almost until dinner, when they had to leave to catch a shuttle so Joanna could go back to school the next day.

Leonard didn’t want to let go as Joanna hugged him goodbye, and Joanna didn’t seem to want to let go either. 

“All right, babygirl, let’s go,” Jocelyn said finally as Joanna pulled away. “Len, you take care of yourself. I don’t want any more calls like – like that one, all right?” She squeezed his hand once. 

“Thanks for coming, Joce,” Leonard said, clearing his throat. He smiled as they walked out, Joanna waving the whole way, then dropped his head back onto the pillow and closed his eyes.

When the doctors came in later to release him under the condition that he stay home from work and take it easy for a week, he dressed quickly, eager to leave.

“You’re going straight home now, right?” the nurse at the front desk said as Leonard signed himself out.

“Just have to make one stop,” he said.

-

It was late for dinner. Leonard was pretty sure most of the chow mein and egg rolls in the bag would go uneaten. He didn’t even really like egg rolls; they were always for David, who was probably already asleep. Leonard bought them anyway.

When the turbolift reached the fifth floor, he hesitated in the hallway, then turned, resolutely, left. His key still opened the door to Jim and David’s place, he’d learned yesterday – a lifetime ago – but he chimed instead. It felt like an hour before the doors slid open to reveal Jim, looking pale and tired and just like home.

“Dinner?” Leonard said weakly, holding up the bag. Jim stared at him for a long second, and then launched himself at Leonard, enfolding him in a bone-crushing hug. “Oof,” Leonard said. “Careful, man, I’ve just had my head pieced back together.”

Jim didn’t let go, and Leonard wrapped his arms around the other man, more grateful than he thought possible just to feel him. 

“It’s not Tuesday,” Jim said into his neck.

“Yeah,” Leonard said. “But I thought you might be hungry.”

Jim pulled back. “I’m sorry I didn’t visit you in the hospital.”

“Don’t be,” Leonard said.

“I had to bring David home, he couldn’t sleep, and he was – ”

“Don’t explain, Jim,” Leonard said. “David comes first. If you think you have to explain that to me, you’re stupider than you look.” Jim looked relieved, and stepped aside to allow Leonard in. “How’s he doing? Is he asleep?”

“Just now,” Jim said, taking the bag from Leonard’s hand and setting it down on the kitchen counter. “And he’s doing okay. It’s – it’s gonna take some time, but he’ll be okay.” He pulled out the egg rolls first and smiled. “You better hide these, or he’ll smell them and wake up.”

“Wouldn’t be the end of the world,” Leonard said, grabbing a plate out of Jim’s cabinet. Jim leaned against the counter and watched as Leonard spooned chow mein and beef onto his plate and began to shovel food into his mouth with his chopsticks.

“God, that’s sexy,” Jim said dryly, and Leonard scowled at him.

“I’ve had nothing but hospital food since lunch yesterday, thanks to you,” he snapped, and Jim’s face fell. “Christ, Jim, I’m kidding. Not about the hospital food, unfortunately, but – Jesus, you think I blame you? Come on, kid. Don’t be an idiot.” Jim still looked stricken, and Leonard put down his chopsticks. “I will actually smack you if you don’t stop looking like I just kicked your puppy, you damn fool. Can’t a man make a joke around here?”

“I almost got you killed,” Jim said in a hollow voice.

“John almost got both of us killed,” Leonard corrected, picking up an egg roll and taking a vicious bite – he was that hungry. “What’d they do with the son of a bitch, anyway?”

“Not sure yet,” Jim said. “Chris thinks they’ll put him back in deep freeze. He was never supposed to be out in the first place. Alexander will be court-martialed.” Jim shook his head. “And I’ll spend the rest of my life feeling like a fucking idiot for not turning him in four years ago.”

“Jim,” Leonard said, and he wanted to say something about not beating yourself up, or all’s well that ends well, but there wasn’t a truism in the world for what they’d been through, so he just took another bite of chow mein and chewed it slowly.

“Bones?” Jim said.

“Yeah?”

“Can I kiss you?”

Leonard swallowed. “Sure,” he said. 

Jim took a tentative step forward and put his hand on Leonard’s waist. “You sure you don’t want to turn around and get out of all this crazy?” he asked, his eyes wide and close, and Leonard knew he wasn’t totally kidding, knew he was being given an out, if he wanted it.

“I brought dinner, didn’t I?” he said, wrapping a hand around the back of Jim’s neck, and then Jim’s lips stopped him from saying anything else for a while, and he was okay – no, more than okay – with that.

-

“Be careful,” Leonard said warningly as Joanna stood up on top of the jungle gym. “Jo, watch it.”

“Bones, she’s fine,” Jim said.

“Joanna, you’re gonna fall!” David called from his place at the bottom rung.

“I’m not,” Joanna said. “I’m gonna be fine. Davy, come up here!”

“I’m scared,” David said, and Leonard saw Jim clasp his hands together tightly.

“Don’t be,” Joanna called. “It’s not scary, I promise.”

David took one more step up to the next level of the jungle gym. “Okay. If you promise it’s not scary.”

Jim leaned back on the bench, his shoulder grazing Leonard’s, and they both watched as David slowly made his way up to the very top. Joanna reached a hand out and held his, tightly, as he pulled himself to his feet and surveyed the park.

“Daddy, I made it!” he yelled, waving to Jim and Leonard on their bench. “Look!”

“I see you,” Jim said, waving back. “You did great, buddy.” Leonard listened as Jim took a deep breath, then blew it out. “He never used to be scared of the jungle gym.”

“He’ll remember not to be,” Leonard said. “Soon enough.” He looked up at the grey November sky. “Fog’s gonna be coming in soon. What do you know, it's another ugly San Francisco day.”

“Yeah,” Jim said. “Are you cold? I told you to bring a jacket.”

“I forgot,” Leonard muttered.

“You’re worse than the kids. Do you want to go home soon?”

“Nah,” Leonard said, pressing against Jim’s shoulder. “I’m adjusting. I think I’ll be okay.”

_fin_

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning: mentions of possible domestic violence.


End file.
